Friday, November 30, 2012

the lazy gal

Hi Blogger! I've got so much to do actually. I'm supposed to do a lesson plan and all its attachments, a quiz, and read up on my MA subject. But here I am, sitting down, listening to cool and relaxing music, contemplating on things, and blogging. This is how hardworking I am (sarcasm obvious).

Undeniably, no matter how industrious you may be, there will be days when you'll rather be a couch potato and a lazy buddy. What else can be better than just sit down and let the day pass aimlessly. At the end of the day though, you'll find yourself cramming, but you'll manage to survive and accomplish everything, nonetheless.

I don't know if that's productive though. As for me, I can deal with all types of work situations - I can work under pressure (I'm used to beating deadlines) and I can work even beyond what was expected of me. It's all a matter of mood and motivation. But today, unfortunately, I am just not in the mood to study and work.

Well, nothing's bad with this bout of laziness. As they say, this too shall pass. Tomorrow, I may have the zeal to go beyond expectations. So this is my dry spell at work. I need a motivation.

But please don't get me wrong, buddy. I'm not lonely. This is not a melancholic write-up. It's just another: "today I don't feel like doing anything, I just wanna lie in my bed."

Thursday, November 29, 2012


Since 2012 is almost ending, I believe it is also good to do some "make-over" in preparation for the year to come. I searched the internet for different long and straight hairstyles and these are what I found:

As I look at these pictures, I can't help but wonder which of these will be most appropriate for a round-faced person like me. I really want to have my hair straightened, and I would also like to experiment on color and a little bit of bangs and layers to have that fierce aura. I am not sure though if it would suit me well. I hope it will, though. I just want an ultimate revamp this 2013, for a prettier and better me. 

Maybe it's time to say goodbye to my good-girl look. I want to look more like a  confident, sassy, and alluring woman. It's about time. :D

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

to do list this 2013 :D

And so 2013 is dawning!!! Soon we will hear firecrackers explode and see fireworks light up the sky. It's even a month from now! Are you excited? Oh well, miraculously, I AM! :D Since I am changing perspectives, I'd like to make a list of things I'd like to do this breakthrough year, 2013! (I claim that it's my year of Miracles, and yes, It's the Year of Faith!) So here they are, in random order.

1. Have my year straightened (and colored)
- I think I need to revamp my look a little. I look too goody goody, you know. Time for a more fierce, lady like look. :D hihihihi

2. Cook one or two dishes a month
- Oh well, this has been long...overdue! I am really interested to learn how to cook a meal! From viands, pasta, desserts, appetizers, and all! Preparation for being a good girlfriend and wife. You know! :P (winks!)

3. Finish my remaining units of MA
- So I can finally move on and get over with it. After studies, I am all out to total enjoyment of life. Break it down, yeah!

4. Go to Puerto Galera and Thailand
- Seriously, travelling is on top of my list, as always! Friends, wanna join?

5. Join an outreach activity
- Because the caring girl within me is kicking in. Spread the love.

6. Save, save, save
- In preparation for the future :D, Hello BDO!
- I need it's also high time to listen to dad regarding the investment he's in. Okay daddy. Noted!

7. Go to a spa and relax all the way!!!!
- I need time to pamper myself after all the hardwork! I deserve it too :P

- Woooah! I claim it. So I'll be young and wild and free and just have funnnnn!!!! :D
- And with all that, I hope I'll find him, too. Happy birthday to me!

9. Celebrate my birthday and pamper myself
- For two years, I have been constantly treating people during my special day. This year, I'll give myself a treat. Because it's not bad to love yourself, after all.

10. Date and meet more friends
- Seriously, I need to find more time to meet with them. They are my life giving spirit. Anyone?

11. Read more books, watch movies, and blog about it!
- I should take this more seriously! Thus, I will really visit bookstores and checkout their good reads :D

12. Learn how to drive
- I'm hoping I can do this, but without a car, how will that be possible???!!! Whoah!
- I've been bugging my dad to buy even a second hand one, but I don't think I have good convincing powers. Sales talk skills please!!!! :D

13. Work out the zumba way, lose weight, and eat more healthy
-Shalalalala! So I need to find time, really! Weekends, hello!
- Vegetables and fish, here I am. I'll try hard, promise!

14. Try a new hobby
- I am not yet certain as to what that will be. All I know is I want to try one. Painting, biking, cooking, planting? Recommendations? Whatever that will be, we'll see!

15. Be more active at The Feast
- Since I have 9 more units to go, perhaps I can be part of the Kids' Ministry and teach children or be a Caring Group Head. Ohlalalalalala! Sounds exhilarating!
- And that means meeting more people!!!! Hooooray!!!! Life is good!
- And of course, being more closer to my one and only God. I love you so much!!! :D (Keeping the faith alive, as always!)

16. Attend seminars which are not related to teaching
- Since I am always attending education related seminars, I guess this time I should try a different "genre".
- Maybe I'll try business, financial management, investing, career, or writing! And I am willing to pay on my own. Besides, it's a new chance to meet new people, new dimension. Now, I can't wait!

** So far, I think I've exhausted all the things I look forward to this 2012. There might be more to come, but I guess these are too much already. With faith, love, hope, vigor, and optimism, I know I can do them. I'll keep upbeat and stay happy to attract good vibes this 2013!!!!

With love, joy, and peace,

Len :D the happy girl

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

joyful heart

I am not a perfect person. I am not the perfect girlfriend either. We are all not perfect. But despite all our imperfections, I so believe we will find the person who will be our perfect pair. :D

I can be annoying at times. I have issues which I try to resolve, and I am aware of it. Hence, I am still working for constant self-improvement. But that does not make me less of a person. Because truth of the matter is, if given the opportunity to love again soon, I know I can do so much.

Lately, my love tank has really been overflowing. This time it's not a desperate attempt  to seek for attention and love, but I would say I want to share the love inside my heart to that special someone who will complement my completeness. A relationship, I believe, is made of two complete persons. If you are an emotionally unstable, the possibility is, you will attract someone your kind. It's sort of a homing instinct, because you sort of want to heal that broken part of a person which is somehow similar to you. I thought back then that being in a relationship will change me dramatically. Only to realize something which is otherwise.

And so maybe the timing was not right before. So what? We all have to move on. Life must go on. And so everyday, I am facing each day with arms wide open, I'm singing a song, moving a long, dancing to and fro to the song of life . I have never been this happy before. And I thought I should depend on that someone all the time for my happiness. No. Not always.

So this time. I'd like to share the joy that I feel inside to my one true love, whoever he is. And my heart is beating fast because I am most excited. I want to do so much for him. I will do everything for love. And when I finally found him, I will sing to my heart's content and thank God that he finally gave that person to me.

It will all be worth the wait and the waiting won't be too long.

I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change. And breakaway....

I have high hopes in Him, and prayers are my ultimate weapon. :D

Continue to feel the love. :D


Len :)

in love with you :)

*** It so happened that I heard this song played in the radio several times. Since then I can't help but hear it playing on my mind. Out of curiosity, I decided to search or it in the net. Luckily I was able to find it!

Nice song, indeed!

<3 :d=":d" inlove="inlove" people="people" span="span" stay="stay">

In love with you
Christian Bautista and Angeline Quinto

Just a gentle whisper, told me that you’d gone
Leaving only memorie, where did we go wrong?
I couldn’t find the words then, so let me say them now
I’m still in love with you
Tell me that you love me, tell me that you care
Tell me that you need me, and I’ll be there
I’ll be there waiting
I will always love you, I will always stay true
There’s no one who loves you like I do
Come to me now
I will never leave you, I will stay here with you
Through the good and bad I will stand true
I’m in love with you
Now we’re here together, yesterday has past
Life is just beginning, close to you at last
And I promise to you, I will always be there
I give my all to you
Living life without you is more than I can bear
Hold me close forever,
I’ll be there….
I’ll be there for you
I will always love you, I will always stay true
There’s no one who loves you like I do
This I promise…
I will never leave you, I will stay here with you
Through the good and bad I will stand true
Hold me closer…
Our love is forever, holding us together
Nothing in this world can stop us now
Love has found, love has found a way
Yeah… love has found a way
I’m in love (I’m so in love), I’m in love
Yes, I’m in love, so in love
I’m in love with you

Monday, November 26, 2012

heart beatssss :))

And so my heart is skipping a beat and a hop hop tap tap tap daradum dadum dadummmmm.

Can you hear it? It's calling for someone else.

Just to clear things out. I'm not inlove, yet.

But I am happy that there's this one nice guy who makes me smile, all the time.

You see, I haven't met him in person, yet. We were text mates and facebook friends. But well, as per the recommendation of my cousin, she said the guy was smart and gentleman. I would say though that what she said were true.

We speak the same language. We understand each other perfectly. He finds time to tell me if he's busy and if he can't text me because he has to do something important. He will tell me that he shouldn't text me but he did just because he wants to know if I am doing fine.

Oh well. Am I just expecting too much? Are those fall hopes?

And maybe it's too early to tell, yet.

As they say, the best is yet to come. But if he's soon to be the one, I'll welcome him with...arms wide open.

After all, I need to be in love again.

I have yet to experience the best feeling in the world. And I bet, it's gonna happen, soooonnnn.

I pray and claim it in Jesus' name.


Wednesday, November 21, 2012

dear calendar

My desk calendar here at work had been my constant companion and partner this year. It has been a living witness as to how busy I was and still is until now, and up to the future. Looking at the things I have to accomplish and had accomplish made me smile and I thought then that the times spent had been so worthwhile.  It has also been a witness as to the things I looked forward to and celebrated back then, like birthdays, reunions, gimiks, get-togethers, family gatherings, out of towns, and so on. Thus, I came to realize how the year has been so busy for me. I did a lot actually. And I would say 2012 has been a very fruitful year.

I guess my calendar also made me realize how my relationship this year had been so fleeting, transitory, ephemeral. I met him, we dated, he vanished, went back to my life, patched things up, tried things out together, then called it quits, and he wanted to be back, till he was gone again. All in a span of even less than a year. It was the most whirlwind of all relationships, I would say. It was like yesterday when I met him, and before I knew it, in a blink of an eye, he was out of my life. :(

But the good thing about looking at it is I was able to breakthrough and write more goals for each month. As it is, there is just one month before the year ends, and I would say that I am facing each day with a happier heart. I have just made my November goal almost come true, and the one for my December is soon to be a reality. I'm becoming less of a pessimist right now, and that's one thing I am proud of.

The year is about to be another closed-chapter and I have to change calendars again. I am not really sad about how 2012 turned out despite the heartbreaking things which happened. Instead, I am overly excited about the surprises 2013 has in store for me. As I prepare myself for a new calendar for the upcoming year, I also am anticipating for the new things to accomplish and look forward to. I can feel it that something ultra-mega special will take place next year. 2013 is the year to LOVE. :D

So thank you dearest calendar. You have really served your purpose well. Cheers to a great year spent with you. One more month, and we can make my dreams come true.

and of course,

Hello 2013!!!


Len :P

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Is she the one?

**** Interesting article I've read in Yahoo. Is your girl already the one? How are we to know. Guys and gals, this might be of help! :P

Because there is no manual for relationships, couples are left to figure things out for themselves. But perhaps, for the men, the biggest issue that they have to figure out asks the question that can possibly change lives forever: How do you know that the girl you're dating today is 'The One' for you? Indeed, how do you become certain that you want to spend the rest of your life with this girl?
For these eight men, the answer to that question came in varying degrees of speed but with the same huge impact. One realized he and his best friend were meant to be together when he saw her drinking beer from the bottle, just one of the guys; another figured it out when his then-girlfriend accepted him for all that he was, warts and all.
Take a cue from these guys. The answer to your own question may not be as complicated as you think.
Sounding board
"I have loved many women before but marriage was never a foregone conclusion with any of them. With my wife, I knew she was the one when she took everything I dished out during happy, sad, and mad times, shoved it back to me to make me happier, sadder, or madder, and was still there for me the morning after, ready to start all over again."—Miguel, businessman
No pretensions
"I remember an incident when my wife and I just started dating. We were both dressed to impress for a romantic dinner in a fancy restaurant, but on our way there, a vehicle from the overpass splashed us with water. I immediately looked at her expecting her to be mad but surprisingly she just laughed and wiped our wet clothes. From that point on, I knew she's the girl that I wanted to marry: unpretentious, funny yet drop dead gorgeous."—Jason, producer
Joined at the hip
"Before we were married, we were friends for eight years. We spent an average of 17 hours a day in each other's company while doing theater work, either as actors or as production staff. We knew each other from head to foot."—Bing, property and procurement head
Just 'The One'
"I knew she was the one because it made me happy when I repeatedly attempted to make her smile in various ways (somewhat low success rate because of outrageous number of attempts). I also knew she was 'the one' because there never was any thought of a possible 'the two'" —Neale, caterer
Unconditional acceptance
"Apart from shared interests, similar values, and a symbiotic sense of humor, it was her complete acceptance of me that was the clincher." —Karlo, editorial director
An authentic better half
"At first, it was because we just have a lot of things in common, like she was also into sports like me and we were both training for the Philippine team. We were going together for seven years and I always said that she's my better half, because when I was younger, mainit yung ulo ko and she was always calm. I was not religious but she was. I was not so close to my family but she's very close to hers, so I would always tell myself, she's really my better half."—Greg, sales and marketing executive
"When we got together, I felt like everything was how it should be. I was happy with everything about her and wasn't willing to give her up. I soon realized that I couldn't imagine life without her." — Albi, corporate buyer
Best friends
"My wife was my best friend almost from the time I met her. We could have long conversations about anything. And she drank beer from the bottle so I knew she was my kind of girl: walang kaartehan. We had a meeting of the minds, and that was how I knew she was the one." —Hoton, entrepreneur

teaching = selfless and unconditional love

Yesterday was not an easy day for me. You see, I had four classes, from 8:40- 12:00 pm , then from 1:00-2:00. My break was recess and lunch. It was physically draining, indeed.

But I don't mind getting tired physically. The only thing that can make you forget how exhausted you are is when you eat, sit down a little, and sleep (which I don't think I can do in school, waahhhhh). After some time you get used to the feeling already. However, it was not that thing I am really talking about.

My exhaustion was beside the point. My kids or my advisory class was sometimes getting the hell out of me. You see, teaching can make you a lion, at times, and worse even a dinosaur. If not for the gift of patience and what they so called tender-loving-care which is innate to me, I guess I  have long resigned from this job. But at the end of the day, and much to the laughs and teasing of my friends, they knew all along I will not really have the heart to leave teaching for so long. Why will I, they say, I am a good teacher. And most of all, I am passionate of my craft. So there.

But hey! Teaching is not a bed of roses everyday. It can be a heaven or hell on earth, depending on your student's moods, or class composition. The attitudes of my girls are so varied, and I believe-- extremes. I have the most quiet, one of the most smart, but I also have the loudest, and sometimes sensitive and moody girls. So how do you strike a balance as a teacher, with only you to handle all of them? That was a tough question to answer.

This is just my second year of being a class adviser, and I am telling you, it is a roller coaster ride. Sure they give me the reasons to smile when they are goody-goody, but they can crush my world into pieces whenever I hear negative remarks about them from my colleagues. But I guess being a teacher or a class adviser is really like that. You don't get to choose your kids, they are given to you. Thus, at the end of the day, you make do for whatever it is that's given, and you strive to mold them to the person you hope they will be. Even if the going gets tough, you stand by them. And as cliche as it may sound, you are there, never giving up.

Having this class as my advisory is a challenge for me this year. We deal with different issues everyday-- from the troubles of peer-pressure, isolation, bullying, problems with academics, friendship conflicts...the list is, endless! So on. And as I am facing them each day, trying to show that face of bravery and dependability, I realized that more than the brains and the techniques you learned from your undergrad days, it takes a well-formed character to be a good teacher. Dealing with all those issues can be terrifying. If you are emotionally unstable and unsure of yourself, how can you direct these kids to the right path? If you never worked on improving and loving yourself, how can you radiate an unconditional love to these children?

Being a teacher is indeed close to motherhood. And being with this kids makes me feel I've grown so much and that someday, I will really know the ins and outs of parenting. Being a teacher made me learn how to connect, sympathize, listen, and understand without judging. But most of all, I would say that I learned to love my kids for who they are, and even for what they are not. Everything is a matter of selfless love and unconditional acceptance. You love them because they are your kids, and at the end, all you want is simply the best for them, nothing more, nothing less.

Therefore, even if sometimes I would rather shrink and die than deal with all my kids' petty issues, I chose to stand strong and be resolute that we will all breakthrough. After all, I am their mother in school, and if I will give up on them, who else will be there to help them get up and carry on. I love them wholeheartedly, and even if they can vex me to the infinite point of no return, I know that I will still go back to them and prod them to stand when they fall. After all, that's the real essence of teaching- never giving up in believing in your students even in the bleakest of all situations.

hello writer's block!!!!

There was a time in your life when you look at the computer and there you are, left with nothing else to write. I am not really complaining about how this writer's block is irritating me, I am more saddened than annoyed. I've got so many ideas running in my head that I guess my brain needs some break-- and have a kitkat. :D

But what am I really writing about? Nothing in particular. It's just a random churvachenzes chenellyn. Duh. What the? I want to write. But I can't think of a topic. Argh. Will I write about love, dating, feelings, faith, teacherhood? What else is there? Whew, draining.

Tick tock tick tock, says the clock. Oh yeah, I need some followers, too you know. 


My coconut shell is starting to process the data in my head. I think I am ready to write. 

Sorry for these bouts of writer's block. 

I guess I just need some brain chit chat.


Len <3 b="b">

Monday, November 19, 2012

because love and happiness is a CHOICE

It's almost December and the coldness fills the air. The Holiday spirit is now kicking in as I can hear the sleigh bells ringing with the "All I want for Christmas is you" as the background music. This is not another blog ranting about my frustrations of being Single and Lonely during the most festive season of the year. Rather, I am writing about my thoughts on finding love, through dating...again. :D

It was just a few months ago when we finally called it quits. After all the throbbing heartache, I came to a point when I found crying idiotic and stupid. Girls and guys alike, even if the pain is as excruciating as it may sound, I always believe that the best we can do is to accept and to move on. Not all things are meant to be anyways. At the end of the day, we have to be thankful that we had such experience. Through the good and the bad of it all, I'm pretty much sure the relationship taught us, a LOT. :P

So what is the next thing to do? As for me, keeping yourself busy is always cool. Finding a hobby, bonding with true friends, travelling, shopping, working out, and beautifying oneself would all be helpful. Instead of focusing on the wrongs and what ifs of the failed relationship, it is best to focus and work on yourself. It is not selfish to do so. And while your doing this, you'll discover so much about you that you did not know before. Set aside the melancholic and suicidal thoughts. Those would not be of help. Forget about the "wish you were here" drama, cause he/she won't be with you (for all you know he/she is looking for someone else). I am not telling that you do get revenge or plot an evil scheme against that person. But I always do believe, guys and girls, the best revenge is to improve thyself and to be handsome/beautiful. And when you see each other again, they will regret that they let you go. However, don't let that get into your system. Think of yourself, always. You are doing it to help yourself, not for your once upon a time lover.

The bouts of melancholia will linger. But we can always do a counterattack. As much as possible, try not to befriend lonesome music. Adele's Someone like you should not be your constant sleeping companion, unless you want it to keep rewinding and playing on your head. Don't let the pathetic mood of sad songs get the hell out of you. Brothers and sisters, as cliche as it may sound, find happiness in all things. Play happy and relaxing music in the background and since and dance to your heart's content. I am not saying that heartbreaking songs should be deleted in your playlist, but if you want to be reminded of your heartache all over again, then do so. Maybe until you realize that your eyes are swollen from crying as you listen to those songs playing, you will believe me that it does not really do much good. Happiness is a choice, my dears. And if you want to be merry, let go of the things that block your happiness.

It may be easier said than done. Yet, at the end of the day, we drive our car to the direction we'd like to go. A brighter and better future is ours for the taking, so are you willing to trap yourself in the devastating past? The road ahead is wider than you can imagine. Take the first step. Fear will set in, but should you fail again, fret not, we can always try again. Besides, the same things do not happen twice. Life may be empty right now, but it is being emptied because it is being filled up with something better. Isn't that exciting?

Yes, we will always find someone better. You may not believe it. I haven't found mine yet, but as it is, I am open to all the possibilities. We should not close doors, if there's an opportunity, grab it. It might not work on the first try, but the chances are all there. Part of moving on is dating again. Some dread it though, because that means we are back to square one. We have to start with the getting to know you stage once more. The hi, hellos, how are yous of it all is here once again. At times you will get impatient because you felt you were dumped and you still felt small after the break up. But I do hope that if you are feeling like that as of now, please do not be hard on yourself. It's not entirely your fault my dear. Go through the pain for a time, but don't stay in the platform, for a lifetime. The fishes in the sea are so much, you just have to go out and do not grow tired of exploring.

And who knows, in one of the many encounters you have had, you might meet your one true love. Don't despair, don't embrace sadness. Instead, love and heal yourself. Count your blessings. Focus on the now and work on everything that you can for a better, wiser, and tougher you. And no matter what happens, don't give up on finding that love, because it will come. One day, we will all realize, all these happen because they have to. We just have to be in pain for now, but life is not won't last long. Fly and soar high and take the journey. Have fun and never let life make you sour just because of a single heartbreak. There's more to life than that. :D 

Smile, be happy, and love again.

With lots of love,

Len <3 nbsp="nbsp">

how to get revenge on your EXXXXXXX :P

**** I just felt this article was posted very timely. So it's almost December and a new year is about to start, I guess it is HIGH TIME for us guys (who experienced a heartbreak) to MOVE ON.

While they may not spend days weeping over the break-up, it’s not always a simple parting for guys who have suffered the blow. Admit it or not at some point following heartbreak (whether it is at the age of 15 or 30) there would have been countless days of melancholy followed by constant cursing accompanied by sporadic bouts of depression and gluttony.
You may even have fallen quickly in love again just to save yourself the pain. However, ultimately realization happens. You have the right to take your time but if you are ready to shift gears and the track, here is the ‘axe you ex’ manual:

· Kill the ego

Admit it! There is more of mental disturbance than resentment over the break-up. It seems like someone tore you apart and you are enraged. It’s difficult not to feel the heat of the situation but you won’t deny that it’s a selfish thing to do. Take it easy on yourself. Check your emotions and thoughts. Try and see the other’s viewpoint. Maybe it was not meant to be.

· Bring back the 'Attitude'

Do away with the drama and wear acceptance on your sleeve. Over-emphasizing the importance of a relationship will make you fall in love with ashes of a bygone life. You don’t want that to happen. Just kick or kiss things goodbye (whichever way you like). No lingering!

· Cut your ties for good

As a customary parting you may whisper a ‘keep in touch’ or ‘we will be friends’ for not ending on a bitter note; however, DON’T you dare believe in it. Being in touch translates to keeping passions alive when you know that things are cold enough to extinguish any flame.

· Grow

Emotionally, spiritually and in your outlook to life. Feel blessed to have experienced the joys of being in love even if it was not forever. To beat the blues, you can start a new hobby. And no, alcohol won’t help, instead start a fitness regime.

· Play bad

It will do you good. Want to help yourself out seriously? Put your available/single status back and hit the club. Beware of touching the alcohol and look for some interesting conversations to indulge in. Who knows you may come across someone you click with.
It was all great until you heard that your ex is dating someone else and the thought is ruining your life. But remember it is actually merely heartache worth 10 seconds that you are spoiling the entire fun for. Think ‘freedom’ and feel the space. Have fun!

@This article was copied from:

Sunday, November 18, 2012

just me

I take it to heart that I am beautiful :D

Indeed :P

And confidence is all that I need!

I am happy, being me.

Lots of love

Len <3 b="b">


They make my world go round!
@thanatopsis :)

what i want most in a guy :))

I am not really particular when it comes to how guys look. When it comes to physical appearance, I do not really go for one single type. My preference over how guys should look vary depending on who I am with. They say that you should have atleast that standard so you would know what you want when you meet one. However, I am a strong believer of  the saying that "what matters most is the heart." I'll rather go for guys with conviction and character than that of a good physique and a handsome face. Beauty fades, eventually, but a good character is hard to form and find.

So what will really turn me on? After all the not-so-good experiences with guys, I will still stand with my belief that I'll go for the guy with a good character. And what will be the bonus and plus points for me? If he's smart and a conversationalist, then we'll get along pretty well for sure. I really love guys who can talk about anything under the sun without hesitations and reservations. When we can discuss about anything even if that's politics, books, culture, individual differences, and celebrities even. I don't know if such type of a guy exist. I guess there's still one. I just want a smart and open-minded guy. One who does not close his doors as to what he wants to talk about. More than a guy who can be my boyfriend and soon to be better-half, I want him to be my confidant and friend.

I realized then the importance of getting to know my soon-to-be boyfriend well. This is where the getting to know you stage plays a crucial role. If there are things we might argue with in the near future, this is the best time to know what are those. What does he really like, what does he hate the most? What does he really like to talk about? And if a guy is smart and well-formed, then these questions he can handle with ease, for he knows himself well. I need a guy who is most sure of who he is, someone who can complement my completeness. But most of all, I pray that he is a guy who loves me no matter what. For when he loves me, he will never ever give up on me.

Sometimes they say that my standards are high because I go for a smart guy. But in defense to that, I'd just like a guy who I can get along with. I'm not saying that he has to be perfect. As I have said a while ago, it's just a big plus factor if he is really smart. He does not have to be an honor student to be one. There are guys who do not have a laude to their name but can talk as if they have overflowing things to share on their head. And of course, confidence is always the key. But definitely not being conceited. Time and again, character matters.

And at the end of the day, I'd like to remain steadfast in my belief that he still exists. And I am certain that we will meet each other. Soon :D

Whatever it is that you asked for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it is yours. 

Saturday, November 17, 2012

the passionate writer

Writing has been my constant companion ever since. Even since I was in elementary, I would often find myself scribbling down random poems and short stories. In fact, I would pile and staple bond papers together such that it would look like a book, and then that is exactly where I will write my short story. Indeed, the writer in me has always been in my veins, and in my heart.

For countless times, writing has saved me from the bouts of boredom and from feeling melancholic. It has been my constant companion and ultimate outlet. Whenever a tear is about to fall from my eyes, I would have that desire to grab a pen and express how I am feeling deep inside. And whenever I am simply happy and blessed, I would have the urge to write it all down, too. It's as if I want my cheerful feelings to be contagious, either in blogs, or through a piece of paper.

Not everyone though is gifted with the ability to write, for we are all given talents which are unique to us. But as for me, I believe the gift of writing is the perfect one for someone like me. Since I am highly melancholic by nature, it is best that I express what I feel by writing all down. If not for this gift, I don't know how I'll be able to manage life. It's just that writing has always been my saving grace. It is there with me through thick and thin, and it is the witness to how I am transforming and working on my road to self-fulfillment and happiness.

I may be busy and be doing a lot of things lately. But I know my passion in writing will never ever fade away. At the end of the day, when I feel bored and nothing to do, I can always see myself doing the same thing, and I feel as if I'm in one with myself again. Or maybe through writing I can be in a universe where I am the protagonist. Writing helps me realize my dreams and it made me believe that I can do whatever I can by just simply being me.

And for every battles still to come in my life, I know I will survive. With the pen and the paper as my companion and sword, I know I will never go wrong. I will continue to live and to write for the rest of my life. I will dream on, stay strong, write, and inspire. Because at the end of the day, I am not writing just for myself, my ultimate goal is to make change and to help others learn from my writings, so that they can bring out the best in them too.

So if you have a talent inherent to you, use it. Make it as an instrument to fulfill your dreams. Be passionate about it and believe.

the calling

If I would be asked what's my ultimate dream if life, a lot of people would actually be surprised. Because I was a consistent honor student from gradeschool to college, people think that I dream big. But actually, No. As I once told a friend, I just want to live simply and with contentment. And when asked what's my calling in life, I can answer with conviction, "to be a mother and a wife."

I would not actually mind if I end up as a housewife if there's a need for it. Taking care of my the family my husband and I will build is "heaven" for me. Waking up in the morning to cook my family's meals, preparing my kids to school and husband to work, doing the laundry and washing the dishes, preparing for the family's Sunday lunch outs and picnics, decorating the house for Christmas, wrapping gifts for my hubby and kids, taking care of them when the don't feel well, I know I can do all those with love. It may sound a monotonous life, but as for me, I'd gladly do that all for the love of my hubby and kids.

This dream is something that "I won't give up." If that means I have to work hard on it or pray everyday, I will willingly do it. That's why today, I am preparing myself to live hat calling of being a mother and wife. And part of it is working on my weaknesses and knowing myself better, because it takes a whole and complete woman to make a good mother and wife. If I will just be a crybaby and a confused lady, I may live that dream but I cannot give myself a hundred percent. And so everyday, I strive to resolve my issues and live each day with joy that overflows so I would be the same when I get married.

Perhaps the reason why I am single for the meantime is because God is preparing and making the way for my noble call. It is not easy to be a devoted mother and wife. It will even take your life and energy, and that means being selfless all for the sake of your family. Thus, I would enjoy my life as a single lady for I know there would come a time I would have to give up all my good-time with friends and going home extremely late. As I have said once, I am just knowing myself better, but not forever alone.

And one day, I know, that man will come into my life, too. The year  2013 will be it.

Ask, believe, and receive.

I claim all these.


Thursday, November 15, 2012

AMALAYER brouhaha and all that fusssssss

My attention and curiosity was caught yesterday morning when I happened to check my twitter account and found this hashtag #Amalayer trending. Unaware of what the issue is about, I had a big question mark on my head and I told myself "What the freaking stuff is this?" Puzzled and bewildered still, I tried to shrug of the idea. However, upon browsing the yahoo news, the answer seemingly seems to slap my face as it is also trending in that site. And so, question answered. I browsed and read through the news.

Apparently, the Amalayer thingy is about an english speaking girl passenger of LRT who happens to pronounced the I'm a liar as "Amalayer." Since I had no idea before, I thought it was "I'm a lawyer" mispronounced. Laughing at my guess, I continued reading and found out that the girl was ranting and shouting at the top of her lungs as the lady guard likewise shouted at her and grabbed her (this was her side of the story). Thus, everything started there and that actuation of the poor lady guard sparked the fire of hatred and loathing from this likewise poor girl. Oh well, talking about individual differences and bouts of temper. I'll just give my big SIGHHHHHHH.

After reading the article, I was not contented. I wanted to see the video and of course it was everywhere, literally. It's trending on social media, thus it is really easy to find. Just one click and I was then watching the viral video which spread like wild fire. I felt aghast and flabbergasted. I asked myself "What the hell is happening to the world?" When confronted and our attention was called for, do we really have to call for other's attention to by literally shouting? At the end of the day though, I am not in the right position to judge. In the first place, I was not there when such drama happened. But of course, as a citizen patrol who just happened to watch the video, you can't help but make preconceived judgments out of what you saw.

I felt sorry for both of them though. First, to the lady guard because she was definitely HUMILIATED. Being shouted at while everyone was watching is indeed, AWKWARD. I can just imagine her shrinking and wishing that she may evaporate right there during that moment. But of course, she can't. And with an english speaking girl screaming at you telling her that she is  "educated," what else will you feel? But it all happened already, and even with all the apologies, the lady guard already felt inferior.

Nonetheless, I also felt sorry for Ms. Amalayer. Because of the video, her face was bannered in all forms of social media, and maybe even in the newspapers and in TV. She was the talk of the town and the subjects of debate, maybe even crucified, laughed at, criticized, mocked at, and judged. She has to admit though that there was a lapse of her part too, even if she was shouted at and being grabbed by the guard. If she was "maltreated," as she said so, it does not give her the right to do the same. What's the use of the term amicable settlement if we would talk in an uncivil manner with each other? In addition, being educated does not also give her the privilege to belittle others just so she can earn respect and stand out. The real essence of being an educated person is knowing how to respect others and to be able to think before you act such that you will not hurt other's feelings. But maybe she was humiliated too, so lesson learned, be careful with what you say or do. Now that we are living in a highly technological era, we have to be wary of our actions, for we never know if there's a camera spying on us.

The damage has been done and the debates are still ongoing. Both parties aired and shared their side of the story. Once again, the netizens are alive and kicking, ranting and commenting on the issue. I just hope that we be mindful that we are not as saintly as we think we are. We may say our piece and stand about it, but at the end of the day, we do not have the right to condemn. The internet and social media provide the avenue for us to speak our minds, but I hope the bashing would not go overboard. After all, both parties are human and commit mistake. Let's move on and learn our lesson so when confronted with the same situation we will all strive to do what's right.

what kind of a vampire are you?

Do you have a difficult person in your life? Do you have that someone who seems to suck the life and joy out of you? If yes, then you've got a "vampire" in your life. Having someone who annoy, pester, and do everything to steal your happiness is difficult and draining, so why not get to know more about that vampire in your life.

First, why are there vampires around? Where are they actually coming from? Actually, these vampires are not just there to simply play around with us. More often than not, these difficult people are also going through something difficult in their lives and the only way they can deal with it is by projecting that to someone else. And if you are a weakling whose feet is not stronghold on the ground, you will easily be victimized by these bloodsuckers. Whenever they make someone feel low because of their pestering, they feel as if they are superior and powerful. So knowing that these vampires are not as monstrous and humongous as they be, will you still allow yourself to be belittled and affected by them? Think again. :)

Second, what are the different kinds of vampires? Look at the list below and reflect. Are you one of them? Does the list remind you of someone you know?

1. Criticizing Vampire: This kind of vampire corrects the wrongs of the world. He feels righteous and has the eye to see the imperfect world around him.

2. Controlling Vampire: Confrontational, pushy and aggressive. He uses forceful personality or his anger to intimidate. This vampire is also a bully to others.

3. Complaining Vampire: He is a giant victim of life's catastrophes. Even if you offer help to this person, he will often find it difficult to execute. 

4. Clinging Vampire: They are the parasites that always look for someone to devour. This type of person cannot be alone.

5. Crying Vampire: They are the type of people who are oversensitive.

6. Coward Vampire: The nicest persons in the world who finds it difficult to say "No."

7. Con Vampire: This vampire is good at lying and honestly believes in his own lies.

Now that we know more about the characteristics of these vampires or difficult people, let's take it as a challenge to know ourselves better. Ask yourself a question "Am I one of them?" And if you are, what steps will you take to make life easier for you so you won't be a burden to someone else. Life is difficult but that does not give you the permission to make life a curse for others. Or if you don't think that life is difficult, then you make it difficult for someone else. 

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

moving on and on and on

And so my ex just texted me last Monday. Yeah, to my surprise. He was asking how I am doing lately. Though surprised, I still managed to thank him for finding time to ask me how I was.

How am I really feeling right now? So what was his score in my heart? Are there still butterflies and flutters in my stomach whenever he texts me? Oh well, I don't know if this was caused by the break-up or after hearing so many wake-up calls from my friends, I guess the care was still there but the love? 70-30. 70% would be "I have moved on." and 30% I still care about you.

I would not say that I have completely forgotten him, but I guess I accepted the fact that I have to let him go as he is becoming a heavy baggage I am forced to carry. I decided to unload so I can travel light. If I really love him, the best thing to do is set him free so that he can no longer hurt my feelings. And so going back, how did I feel upon seeing his text aside from being bewildered? Honestly, I felt puzzled and quite annoyed. I mean, how can he act so insensitive as if nothing happened, as if he didn't tell me that we'll be okay and then again he'll disappear on me for a month? What does he really think of me? A toy, a reserve force, someone who he can leave and pick up when he feels like it. It's me who can change the way he thinks about me. He has to learn his lesson too.

So what did I do? I finally said that:
It's not okay but I guess that's  okay na din. I  did my best but I guess that's it. Be happy. Find what makes you happy and that's not me. :)) (with smiley, take note). I'll pray for you.
No matter how hard and painful that may be, I guess it's really the right thing to do. Apparently, he wants to go back to my life. But I did not say "YES". I did not accept him, but instead I said I wanted to talk to him in person. He said he will. But I won't wait anymore. After all, he has his pride. And we are no longer into a relationship, so why would he waste his time talking to me heart to heart if he knows he can't get something from me. I guess, that's really it. Period. End of story.

But I guess, I still want him to talk me. And prove me wrong. After all, I wanted to end this up in a mature manner. I need the closure that I deserve. And I want to part ways with him with respect and not with hatred. But should he fail me, I cannot do anything about him anymore. That was a choice he made for himself, not mine.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Tips from Mr SAM YG :P

Sam YG’s Fashion Deal Breakers And More

Boys Night Out DJ and TV host Sam YG is probably an expert—on girls that is, even if he denies it. "As a matter of fact, ako nga ang laging na hu-hurt," he says. But all is fair in love and war, and there is always a lesson to be learned. Style Factor asks this soldier of love what exactly are the deal breakers when it comes to women. Time to get your pens and papers ready girls!

What makes a girl irresistible to a guy?

When it comes to fashion, it's not just what a girl wears but how she wears it that makes her irresistible. A woman who exudes confidence is always sexy!

Do sexy outfits always work on men?

Dressing sexy is one thing but being classy is another. A woman doesn't need to show too much skin to look hot. It's all about the X-factor. Actions speak louder than clothes. A girl could be in a shirt and jeans, and still look sexy if she knows how to bring it.
How should a girl dress if she's looking into impressing a guy?
Do make an effort to look good but don't compromise comfort and your personality. Make sure you leave enough room for his imagination—some gigil and the pa-next factor; yung gusto ka niya ulit makita next time.
What is your general take on makeup?
Makeup is cool but overdoing it could turn out to be a disaster. In the words of great conyos: make sure you make bagay the makeup to the occasion. Leave room for your natural beauty.

What kind of girls will boys take seriously?

I think every guy has different wants and needs when it comes to finding the right girlaloo but here's a basic principle: how you act determines how you will be treated.  If you want men to see you as the pang-seryosotype, make sure you act like one. On the other hand, if you put yourself out there too much, you may be perceived as malandi. A woman who knows what she wants is always a turn-on, the ideal PIKM (Pwedeng Iuwi Kay Mommy) type.
What do you think a girl should wear on a first date?
I suggest a girl puts on a HOHOLicious (a person na masarap ka Hang Out Hang Out) outfit. Make sure you are comfortable with what you're wearing. I'd actually advise that you put on one of your all-time favorite ensembles—something that you know would bring out the best in you. If you plan to make lamon, wag mashadong mag-body fit. Avoid showing too much on the first date. Baka kung saan ka dalin ni boylaloo.

Is it advisable to MOMOL (Make Out Make Out Lang) on the first date? 

I wouldn't want to put any rules on whether to MOMOL or not on the first date. If it feels right then go for it. Never waste a good moment or a good MOMOL for that matter. Always keep in mind that MOMOL does not mean love. Once you get the two mixed up, it could lead to a heart failure. Also remember that you're only as good as your last MOMOL.
What are the most likely annoying things a girl can do when out with a guy?
Talk on the phone, text ng text, be too clingy, start a lover's quarrel. If she panics kasi walang WiFi and she can't tweet, malala na yanSa internet cafe nalang kayo mag-date. You can buy the most expensive things but you can't buy class. Act like a lady and you'll be treated like one.
Is there such a thing as too maarte? 
I believe being maarte has a lot to do with a girl's upbringing. Not all laking-aircon girls are maarte. Others girls like to play arte-artehan—they pretend to have conyo problems kahit wala naman talaga. A girl's artefactor would depend on the guy and people she hangs out with. What some would find maarte, others would find normal. In short, weather weather lang yan.
Are looks that important to men?
Of course. Before you even talk or get to know a girlaloo, the first thing you notice is her physical appearance. Looks are something but they're definitely not everything. Looks cannot sustain the kilig for a long time. Down the road, the physical will fade and you'll look for something deeper. I'd rather have a girlaloo I could have a decent conversation with. Somebody passionate about life and what she does. If a girl can make my brain kilig, winner yan.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

the reading teacher

Since I am fond of writing and reading, I intend to make the most out of this blog site (so please pray for me that I get more followers. Soon, I will be posting the books that I am currently reading. I do hope you can good ideas on what are good reads through my blog site. :D

Reading nourishes the soul! Let's read and feed our mind.

sweets for a sweet tooth

Hello blogger peeps!

Are you a certified sweet tooth? Do you like cakes and cupcakes?

Then please do try and order through The Ministry of Cupcakes.

Pls check their facebook page here:

Certified delicious and worth the price you pay!!!

So why wait? Order  now and satisfy your cravingssss!!!

the traveler in me :))

It has always been my dream to travel. I love the feeling of preparing a big bag and pack it with the things I need. I also love taking pictures of myself and of the breath taking scenery of nature. And nothing else would beat the feeling of doing this with family and dear friends.

So this coming 2013 and beyond, these are the places that I look forward to visit. I really do hope, Soon!

It's more fun in the Philippines!!!!

1. Bohol
- Chocolate hills, tarsiers, and the Loboc river. Sounds really close to nature, isn't it. It needs a plane ride though, but that's okay!!!

2. Puerto Galera
- Swimming, Beach, nightlife!!! Three things to look forward to at Puerto Galera! Plus it is easier to go to as compared to the other tourist destinations which would require a plane ride. White sand beach pleaseeee!!!

3. Palawan
- This place always tickle my fancy. What's there to fascinate me? Well, the Underground river, and all the other majestic views of nature such as its waters. Palawaaannnn, I'll drop by soon!

4. Pagudpod, Ilocos
- Talking about "Walang Hanggan", isn't it really breath taking? From the looks of it on TV, it really looks romantic, serene, and simply...awe-inspiring. I wanna run uphill and shout at the top of my lungs. Worries fade away. Whewwwww!!!!

5. Cebu
- I am not really sure of the tourist spots to visit here, but what I really want to try here is there sumptuous food! Cheap but delicioso! Well, tickle thy tastebuds and forget the diet! Cebu, we'll have a gastronomical meeting soon! :D

Beyond Philippines :)

1. Thailand
- It has always been my dream to travel to those culturally rich country. Imagine the temples, scenery, tropical climate, mouth-watering dishes, wouldn't that be a great travel escapade? Oh Thailand, land of the free... I know we'll be together, soon. I claim it this 2013!!!! (shopping in Bangkok, plus Beach in Phuket, and oh.. the tamarind candies!)

2. Vietnam
- I am not really certain as to what tourist spots are here for me to discover, but they say it's culturally enriching too. Hence, I want to see what's in store for me in Vietnam. And the food is great and cheap here too!

3. South Korea
- Anyeosayo! Did I spell it right? South Korea fascinates me ever since I was a teen-ager. I'm not into Korean foods, but I would like to explore their different tourists spots, and hopefully meet and greet some Korean stars (like Lee-Min Ho... wishful thinking!)

4. New Zealand
- Mountains, hills, windmills, cows, and tulips... I only have one thing in mind- New Zealand! Actually, this country is more than a tourist destination for me, as this is where I want to migrate and settle down. It may be far from possible right now, but I can wait until it happens. I'll set my foot there too!

5. Canada
- There's nothing really special about this country. It's just that my cousins and tito are there so I'd like to drop a visit. :D


And I'm not losing hope, I'll be going to any of these, ASAP. :D
I claim it, I started with Baguio. Who knows where else I'll be soon? (winks!!!)

Saturday, November 10, 2012


When I try to reassess myself the past few months, I realized that I came to change for the better. I used to be this real shy, insecure, fearful, doubtful girl who's always hiding inside her shell. I'm afraid to meet more people, take brand new risks, and try out things which I never have done before. Though it's true that much is still to be improved, it also is not easy to change things overnight. Hence, as the year is about to end (1 more month to go),I know there are still more things to add in my self-improvement checklist.

What I am happy about lately is how I learned to love myself all the more. I used to think that thinking lowly of myself is humility, apparently it is just downgrading myself, making me believe as if I'm dirty and small. It's only then that I learned that you cannot expect people to love you unless you truly love yourself. I've been looking for that love and fulfillment somewhere and someplace else, but at the end of the day, it's always you who will save yourself. It's a sad fact of life that most of the time, you can only count on yourself as people have their own businesses too- they do have the same troubles, pains, frustrations, and worries that we cannot afford to add up as their burden.I'm not saying that we really will be forever alone, but sometimes, we all have to be alone to cherish all the more the feeling of having company. That's why I learned to enjoy my moments of solitude because I know for a fact that I am not forever alone. Someday soon, my one true love will come into my life, and even if there will be ups and downs in that relationship, I can feel it in my heart that it is worth the wait.

I also learned to be more talkative and sociable. Thanks to my newfound community- The Feast. Through The Feast, I was able to share my talents, meet more people, improve on my relationships with people, love and value myself, work on my attitude and behavior, and most importantly be closer to my creator. All these I had in one organization. I never really felt this light before, and honestly, everyday, I look forward to attending our worship service and our caring group meetings. I also look forward to meeting more people and extending a helping hand to different forms of outreach activities. I used to be really bored of life lately, but now, I felt that 7 days a week is not enough to do all the things in my checklist. The world is now mine for the taking that I can do so much. This time, I am not afraid. I have someone up there who will back me up.

So even if I failed in my relationship recently, I am not really down in the dumps. I'm glad that I was given the grace to learn, to move on, and to pick up the pieces no matter how distressing the situation is. As I am always telling myself, I am no longer questioning why things end up that way. All I have right now is an enduring, open, grateful,and understanding mind. As it is, trials do come to shape us to the person we want to be. Besides, if we fail today, that is an opportunity to examine ourselves and strive to be better the next time around. Life is one big roller coaster ride, full of excitement and thrill, and instead of being devoured by fear and paranoia that we might fall, we can always raise our hands, shout at the top of our lungs, and enjoy the one hell of a ride.

The curtains of year 2012 are about to close, but I am not really leaving yesterday behind. If some areas of my yesteryears are full of bitter and painful memories, I will use them as a source of inspiration to do better. It may be easier said than done, but I will try everything so that I won't end up doing the same mistakes, again and again. At the end of the day, I thank my Almighty Creator for everything that happened because despite all the obstacles, He has still blessed me abundantly thus far- in my relationship with family, friends and others, in my career, in my studies, and in my financial life. I am still praying for that love, though. But I am open to all the possibilities and claiming my victory as early as now. And even if I get hurt before, I will carry on because nothing just happens. Today I can say with conviction I love my life and I would like to live a hundred years, and I am happy for being me.

Let's all be strong dear friends. God will also answer our prayers.

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Christmas single??? No more!

Hail to the Holiday and Christmas season. How may days do we have before that time of the year comes, once again? Here we are again busying ourselves with the endless Christmas shopping and panic buying, as if its the "end of the world." Oh well, seriously speaking, Christmas is always something we look forward to.

As for all the SMPs out there, welcome to the federation! But honestly, this time around, for reasons unbeknownst to me, I really don't know why I'm not fretting this team. Comparing to how I was 3-4 years ago, I always ALMOST cry everytime it's Christmas thinking that "Here I am again, single, lonely, no boyfriend, not even a single suitor or admirer." The year 2012 was really a big turning point in my life. Things do change, though not in an instant, and much as I am certain that I want and need to be inlove, I am not overly paranoid about it. Not anymore.

Maybe because recently someone broke my heart. But well, yes, I decided to let him go (and set him free so I can free myself from the manacles too) once and for all. There's no used to be stuck on the same plane while you're just waiting endlessly for Mr. Paasa. Cris has his own reasons, which I tried to understand. Admittedly there were lapses on my part, too. And much as I regret it, it's too late. Anyways, you have too learn to grant yourself forgiveness just the same. If things did not work out the way you both wanted it to be, acceptance is the sure key. Someone better is out there waiting for me, I just have to believe everyday, and yes, endure and wait PATIENTLY.

So what's there to look forward to this Christmas? Lovelife? It will come, YESSS!!!! Deep inside me, I know I deserve that good guy I am praying for. Perhaps that's exactly the reason why I am excited rather than panicky that the Yuletide Season is coming. I am overly anticipating, and my arms and heart are both wide open for the blessing. Unusual? Yes it is for me to act this way! First time? Yes it really is! I'm glad for the change that's happening to me. And this time, I will take it to heart, I'll do my very best to ward off the paranoid and desperate thoughts.

I'll live a hundred years and do everything that I can to live meaningfully. Deep inside my heart, I know that I have a family to build and take care of, that with my kids and hubby. Whoever he is, I just hope he will know how eager and overly excited I am to finally meet him. Would you believe when I say my love tank is overflowing that I'd like to share that love with someone else? It really is. I am ready to give that love wholeheartedly. I know I will. My heart is telling me it is coming, soon.

Hence, this coming December, I know there are innumerable reasons to rejoice and celebrate. With a happy heart, I am ending this year with prayers and faith that finally God answered my prayer, I just have to believe. I am no longer desperate and doubtful, I know it's here. He's coming. How will I know? My heart will just tell me, and when he's finally there, there's not a moment to loose, as I will never let go.

So to my darling and dearest, see you. I know this Christmas will be the happiest ever. Even if you may not be around during that time yet, I claim it that it will be the time that God will finally give His big YEEESSSS to my prayer.

"And whatever it is that you asked for in Prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."

Wednesday, November 7, 2012


I don't want to think I am alone because I am not.

As the Law of Attraction states, you attract what you think.

Think of sadness, and you'll feel lonely.

Think of emptiness, all the more you'll be hollow.

Think of frustrating things, and you'll be down in the dumps.

Our mind has a strong influence on our actions and what our life becomes.

I want to be happy, so I am.

If I always have to give and share just so someone will be with me, I would look at it in such way that I am so blessed to give. Someday soon, I don't need to beg off so that people will be with me.

If God is emptying your life, He is preparing you for something big, so you need to have that hollow space, just in the meantime.

My life is still undergoing a major renovation. But believe it or not, I am happy and contented with my lot.

I am thinking of happy thoughts. And nothing can stop me from being optimistic. :D

Monday, November 5, 2012

new directions

After all that I've been through lately (the hurly-burly and ups and downs of emotions), I finally mulled-over that I cannot be the cry baby that I was and still am. It's freaking hard to change overnight, but I have that irking feeling that I want to transform myself. It is really difficult to let go of the things you are used to, just as it is difficult to let go and forget that person you loved so dearly. But then again, at the end of the day, I may end whining and tearing and sulking, but my happiness is still up to me.

Complaining will bring me nowhere, just as worrying is like a rocking chair that keeps moving but stays at the same place. If I cannot change the way things are, then might as well I change my mindset about them. The pressure of finding my one true love bugs me. I tried to grab the opportunity when there was one, but ended up in vain. Believe it or not though, I am not regretful nor bitter. Why do I have to keep crying about something which is over? Even if he did not really give me the closure I deserve, it is a challenge for me to move forward on my own. Indeed, you will always have yourself to depend on, and to rely on others will fail us, more often than not.

I am not afraid to fall inlove again. If it will happen (which I know will happen, sooon :) ), then it will and I will gladly accept it with arms wide open under the sunlight. I have no fears, doubts, and hesitations. I am not rushing things. It's just that, this time, I know that my love tank is overflowing with love that I would share it without hesitations to that someone. As Toni G. puts it, "one day, that man will come into your life and will make you forget that your heart was ever broken." So I am not setting my dream of finding my one true love aside. It is too early to give up. Much has happened but that does not entail letting go of such a noble and wondrous dream. Besides, things do not happen only twice, but mistakes are repeated unless they are learned. If I failed again and again, then I will dust off my knee and stand again and again. What's wrong with that huh? Nothing. I am sometimes weak, frail, losing judgment, but that does not make me less of a person. i am human after all. I do not brag that I am invincible. This warrior will always be a child longing for her dear parent's love and affection. But despite all the struggles, I have proven that I become strong when I am at my weakest point.

So what's there to be afraid of, honestly? Nothing. Worrying still about tomorrrow? Maybe, yes, but that will not ultimately cloud my vision. A bright future is ahead of me, and it's glaring my eyes because I feel there's so much, I just have to seize every opportunity that comes my way. And for all the hurdles, the pain, tears, and heartbreaking moments I have been through lately, I have nothing but gratitude because the Lord entrusted me with all those. He believes in my resilience and in my ability to breakthrough. Thus, is there still a need to fear. Definitely, No. No matter how hard it may sound, I'll do everything in my power not to fret about the future. Let tomorrow take care of itself. What matters is the present, that you have the willingness to do everything that you can today so that you will have no regrets in the future.

God is always good to me, today, tomorrow, and until the end of time. If there is something that I will hold on to tightly, that is my faith in HIM. It will remain unceasing and unwavering, and I know by keeping the faith aflame, that day will come when God will answer all my prayers, and He will grant my heart's desires, even better than what I have asked for.

And I believe that whatever it is that you asked for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. I claim it in Jesus' mighty name. Amen :))