Thursday, February 20, 2014

I know I’ll meet you, someday J



In the process of finding you, I broke my heart several times. I realized it was not that easy. I stumbled and got bruised and it hurt me so much. I thought wounds will never heal at all. Actually, the wounds are still bleeding right now. But I choose to simply bear them, because I know enduring it will make me stronger. Perhaps I got heartbroken because those who I met were not just meant for me, yet. As cliché as it may sound, the best is yet to come. I’d like to believe that’s you.


I never know if I already met you. I could have happened to bump into you before. Maybe we have been introduced to each other but the sparks were not yet there. Or maybe I happened to tread on the very same path where you always walk. I’ll never know, until I meet you, in the near future.


Nothing is certain, and when we will meet each other, is still a big mystery. But with all honesty, the mystery of it all excites me. I wonder how you look like. I yearn to know what interests or excites you. I want to know your life story- how your childhood and family was like, who was your first crush, how you were at school. I just want to listen to your stories while I stare at you and we snuggle together. I look forward to all our times together with intense anticipation. However, the time may not be now. Not yet.


I know and acknowledge that I am not perfect. There are still a lot I have to work on. And whilst I’m not meeting you yet, I want to use the time wisely because I know it is an opportunity for me to grow in character and get to know myself better. I’d like to meet you when I am most ready- when I know what I want,  learn to love myself, and work on my weaknesses. Right now, I can’t fully say I’m the right woman for you. I may do something which will hurt you, in one way or another.  Someday, I know I will be the right woman for you, and when that day comes, there’s no backing out. It will be the best love story, which happened in God’s perfect time.

I’m walking in faith and trusting in God’s Providence. When all else goes awry, we will realize that we can always put our hope in God. Things did fall apart because things are being slowly put in place. Life is a constant work in progress, and I believe that even if things go wrong, it goes better, anyway. All we need to have is a heart that fervently believes, keeps the faith with love burning intensely. I pray that we will both be strong to endure our heartaches, and get healed in time. So that one day, when we meet, we know we are more than ready to love, again.

I promise not to give up on meeting or finding you. It may be a long and tedious waiting for all we know. We might feel, sometimes, that the waiting seems to be in vain, that we may be waiting for nothing at all. But my heart tells me to trust. A voice inside me tells me to believe, and hope, and just open my heart for that someone out there. When that day comes, we will not experience that pain caused by  heartaches, for we are definite that we already met the one we’d like to spend our forever with.

I will wait for you, for that day, for our love story. Right now, I will learn, grow, soar high, and simply become the best that I can be. I hope you will do the same, too. I pray that you’re excited to meet you, too. And that one day in our future will be the happiest of all, because we know we both waited, and what we have been praying for so long, is already answered.


Your future girlfriend and wife,

Ellen Marie



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