In the society we live in, we are often bound to mask or camouflage our innermost feelings. Thinking that we will be judged, misunderstood, or perceived as difficult to deal with, we'd rather hide the pain or conceal our fears, angst, gloom, or hurts. When asked the question "How are you?", we often response with the classic "I'm fine," even if in reality, it's the other way around. It is seemingly an unwritten rule for us to pretend we are okay, or to carry our burdens deep within, for they will be solved anyway, in the long run.
But even the most optimistic and joyful of all person has its limits and boundaries. And our real emotions will soon find its way out. As shown in the movie "Inside Out," Joy cannot rule over Sadness forever. Yes, for a couple of days, we will succeed in feigning gladness. At one point, we can still muster the courage and feel that we are okay. Yet, when left on our own, and when we try to mull-over things, in silence of the night, what we are truly feeling will finally surface. We may try to acknowledge or deny what we really feel, but either way, no matter how we bottle them up deep inside, it will eventually find its way out.
This battle of emotions was evident in the movie "Inside Out" when Riley tried her best to show her parents that she is satisfied with their current situation and that it was an easy pill for her to swallow. But moving to a new place, and leaving her hometown and friends was surely a big adjustment for her. However, since her parents somehow expect her to be the usual happy girl that she is, she has to feign acceptance and full submission to her parent's decision, even if deep inside, the painful reality has not sunk in that much. There was much adjustment to do, and that was not fully processed with her, nor was she prepared for it. All of that was like a roller-coaster ride for Riley, but she has to try to live with what was expected of her, thus, denying or hiding her true feelings.
In the end, Riley knew their new life was not a walk in the park. She missed her hometown, and her friends. But like any of us, she pretended as if she was perfectly fine. Until one day, the bottled up feelings suddenly explode. At this point, we are enlightened that there will come a point that the emotions we bury deep within will reveal itself in time. Until when is it safe to deny ourselves what or how we truly feel? At what point is it safe to say that we are okay? Shall we just smile or pretend that everything is alright, or should we acknowledge that sadness and despair is creeping in, and we need someone to talk it out, to eventually lighten our load?
As the character, Sadness, puts it "Crying helps me slow down and obsess over the weight of life's problems." We often perceive crying as a sign of weakness, but in fact, those who admit that they feel lonely or sad, are courageous enough to admit and embrace their innermost feelings. Nothing is wrong with crying or tearing up over life's troubles. Just as there is thunderstorm and rain, surely life has its share of dark days. What's worth remembering and looking forward though, it that these gloomy feeling has its expiration date. The world is full of binaries, when there is rain, soon, the sun will rise and shine again. When we cry, we cleanse ourselves of the emotions that's burdening us and a way to purge pent up emotions so they don't lodge in our bodies. Our eyes may be dimmed by the tears that well-up as we cry, but we sure will feel that our vision is clearer after the outpour of tears.
Denying oneself of our innermost emotions is futile because the truth shall always prevail, and as cliche as it is, will set one free. So the next time you feel deep inside that you feel sad, gloomy, depressed, or anything that is tantamount to "not perfectly fine," acknowledge that what you feel is real and worthy of attention and processing. After all, there is a healthy amount of loneliness that's worth mulling over with. Feel your feelings, because in the end, our feelings hold the key to our well-being. "Don't worry. It's okay to be sad. Feel it. Let it out. After that, everything will be alright." :)
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