moving on and on and on

And so my ex just texted me last Monday. Yeah, to my surprise. He was asking how I am doing lately. Though surprised, I still managed to thank him for finding time to ask me how I was.

How am I really feeling right now? So what was his score in my heart? Are there still butterflies and flutters in my stomach whenever he texts me? Oh well, I don't know if this was caused by the break-up or after hearing so many wake-up calls from my friends, I guess the care was still there but the love? 70-30. 70% would be "I have moved on." and 30% I still care about you.

I would not say that I have completely forgotten him, but I guess I accepted the fact that I have to let him go as he is becoming a heavy baggage I am forced to carry. I decided to unload so I can travel light. If I really love him, the best thing to do is set him free so that he can no longer hurt my feelings. And so going back, how did I feel upon seeing his text aside from being bewildered? Honestly, I felt puzzled and quite annoyed. I mean, how can he act so insensitive as if nothing happened, as if he didn't tell me that we'll be okay and then again he'll disappear on me for a month? What does he really think of me? A toy, a reserve force, someone who he can leave and pick up when he feels like it. It's me who can change the way he thinks about me. He has to learn his lesson too.

So what did I do? I finally said that:

It's not okay but I guess that's  okay na din. I  did my best but I guess that's it. Be happy. Find what makes you happy and that's not me. :)) (with smiley, take note). I'll pray for you.

No matter how hard and painful that may be, I guess it's really the right thing to do. Apparently, he wants to go back to my life. But I did not say "YES". I did not accept him, but instead I said I wanted to talk to him in person. He said he will. But I won't wait anymore. After all, he has his pride. And we are no longer into a relationship, so why would he waste his time talking to me heart to heart if he knows he can't get something from me. I guess, that's really it. Period. End of story.

But I guess, I still want him to talk me. And prove me wrong. After all, I wanted to end this up in a mature manner. I need the closure that I deserve. And I want to part ways with him with respect and not with hatred. But should he fail me, I cannot do anything about him anymore. That was a choice he made for himself, not mine.

Tips from Mr SAM YG :P

Sam YG’s Fashion Deal Breakers And More

from: http://ph.omg.yahoo.com/blogs/ph-stylefactor/sam-yg-fashion-deal-breakers-more-094854762.html

Boys Night Out DJ and TV host Sam YG is probably an expert—on girls that is, even if he denies it. "As a matter of fact, ako nga ang laging na hu-hurt," he says. But all is fair in love and war, and there is always a lesson to be learned. Style Factor asks this soldier of love what exactly are the deal breakers when it comes to women. Time to get your pens and papers ready girls!

What makes a girl irresistible to a guy?
When it comes to fashion, it's not just what a girl wears but how she wears it that makes her irresistible. A woman who exudes confidence is always sexy!

Do sexy outfits always work on men?
Dressing sexy is one thing but being classy is another. A woman doesn't need to show too much skin to look hot. It's all about the X-factor. Actions speak louder than clothes. A girl could be in a shirt and jeans, and still look sexy if she knows how to bring it.

How should a girl dress if she's looking into impressing a guy?
Do make an effort to look good but don't compromise comfort and your personality. Make sure you leave enough room for his imagination—some gigil and the pa-next factor; yung gusto ka niya ulit makita next time.

What is your general take on makeup?
Makeup is cool but overdoing it could turn out to be a disaster. In the words of great conyos: make sure you make bagay the makeup to the occasion. Leave room for your natural beauty.

What kind of girls will boys take seriously?
I think every guy has different wants and needs when it comes to finding the right girlaloo but here's a basic principle: how you act determines how you will be treated.  If you want men to see you as the pang-seryosotype, make sure you act like one. On the other hand, if you put yourself out there too much, you may be perceived as malandi. A woman who knows what she wants is always a turn-on, the ideal PIKM (Pwedeng Iuwi Kay Mommy) type.

What do you think a girl should wear on a first date?
I suggest a girl puts on a HOHOLicious (a person na masarap ka Hang Out Hang Out) outfit. Make sure you are comfortable with what you're wearing. I'd actually advise that you put on one of your all-time favorite ensembles—something that you know would bring out the best in you. If you plan to make lamon, wag mashadong mag-body fit. Avoid showing too much on the first date. Baka kung saan ka dalin ni boylaloo.

Is it advisable to MOMOL (Make Out Make Out Lang) on the first date? 
I wouldn't want to put any rules on whether to MOMOL or not on the first date. If it feels right then go for it. Never waste a good moment or a good MOMOL for that matter. Always keep in mind that MOMOL does not mean love. Once you get the two mixed up, it could lead to a heart failure. Also remember that you're only as good as your last MOMOL.

What are the most likely annoying things a girl can do when out with a guy?
Talk on the phone, text ng text, be too clingy, start a lover's quarrel. If she panics kasi walang WiFi and she can't tweet, malala na yan. Sa internet cafe nalang kayo mag-date. You can buy the most expensive things but you can't buy class. Act like a lady and you'll be treated like one.

Is there such a thing as too maarte? 
I believe being maarte has a lot to do with a girl's upbringing. Not all laking-aircon girls are maarte. Others girls like to play arte-artehan—they pretend to have conyo problems kahit wala naman talaga. A girl's artefactor would depend on the guy and people she hangs out with. What some would find maarte, others would find normal. In short, weather weather lang yan.

Are looks that important to men?
Of course. Before you even talk or get to know a girlaloo, the first thing you notice is her physical appearance. Looks are something but they're definitely not everything. Looks cannot sustain the kilig for a long time. Down the road, the physical will fade and you'll look for something deeper. I'd rather have a girlaloo I could have a decent conversation with. Somebody passionate about life and what she does. If a girl can make my brain kilig, winner yan.

the reading teacher

Since I am fond of writing and reading, I intend to make the most out of this blog site (so please pray for me that I get more followers. Soon, I will be posting the books that I am currently reading. I do hope you can good ideas on what are good reads through my blog site. :D

Reading nourishes the soul! Let's read and feed our mind.

sweets for a sweet tooth

Hello blogger peeps!

Are you a certified sweet tooth? Do you like cakes and cupcakes?

Then please do try and order through The Ministry of Cupcakes.

Pls check their facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ministry-of-Cupcakes-PH/525059260856491

Certified delicious and worth the price you pay!!!

So why wait? Order  now and satisfy your cravingssss!!!

the traveler in me :))

It has always been my dream to travel. I love the feeling of preparing a big bag and pack it with the things I need. I also love taking pictures of myself and of the breath taking scenery of nature. And nothing else would beat the feeling of doing this with family and dear friends.

So this coming 2013 and beyond, these are the places that I look forward to visit. I really do hope, Soon!

It's more fun in the Philippines!!!!

1. Bohol
- Chocolate hills, tarsiers, and the Loboc river. Sounds really close to nature, isn't it. It needs a plane ride though, but that's okay!!!

2. Puerto Galera
- Swimming, Beach, nightlife!!! Three things to look forward to at Puerto Galera! Plus it is easier to go to as compared to the other tourist destinations which would require a plane ride. White sand beach pleaseeee!!!

3. Palawan
- This place always tickle my fancy. What's there to fascinate me? Well, the Underground river, and all the other majestic views of nature such as its waters. Palawaaannnn, I'll drop by soon!

4. Pagudpod, Ilocos
- Talking about "Walang Hanggan", isn't it really breath taking? From the looks of it on TV, it really looks romantic, serene, and simply...awe-inspiring. I wanna run uphill and shout at the top of my lungs. Worries fade away. Whewwwww!!!!

5. Cebu
- I am not really sure of the tourist spots to visit here, but what I really want to try here is there sumptuous food! Cheap but delicioso! Well, tickle thy tastebuds and forget the diet! Cebu, we'll have a gastronomical meeting soon! :D

Beyond Philippines :)

1. Thailand
- It has always been my dream to travel to those culturally rich country. Imagine the temples, scenery, tropical climate, mouth-watering dishes, wouldn't that be a great travel escapade? Oh Thailand, land of the free... I know we'll be together, soon. I claim it this 2013!!!! (shopping in Bangkok, plus Beach in Phuket, and oh.. the tamarind candies!)

2. Vietnam
- I am not really certain as to what tourist spots are here for me to discover, but they say it's culturally enriching too. Hence, I want to see what's in store for me in Vietnam. And the food is great and cheap here too!

3. South Korea
- Anyeosayo! Did I spell it right? South Korea fascinates me ever since I was a teen-ager. I'm not into Korean foods, but I would like to explore their different tourists spots, and hopefully meet and greet some Korean stars (like Lee-Min Ho... wishful thinking!)

4. New Zealand
- Mountains, hills, windmills, cows, and tulips... I only have one thing in mind- New Zealand! Actually, this country is more than a tourist destination for me, as this is where I want to migrate and settle down. It may be far from possible right now, but I can wait until it happens. I'll set my foot there too!

5. Canada
- There's nothing really special about this country. It's just that my cousins and tito are there so I'd like to drop a visit. :D

****

And I'm not losing hope, I'll be going to any of these, ASAP. :D
I claim it, I started with Baguio. Who knows where else I'll be soon? (winks!!!)

novermberealizations

When I try to reassess myself the past few months, I realized that I came to change for the better. I used to be this real shy, insecure, fearful, doubtful girl who's always hiding inside her shell. I'm afraid to meet more people, take brand new risks, and try out things which I never have done before. Though it's true that much is still to be improved, it also is not easy to change things overnight. Hence, as the year is about to end (1 more month to go),I know there are still more things to add in my self-improvement checklist.

What I am happy about lately is how I learned to love myself all the more. I used to think that thinking lowly of myself is humility, apparently it is just downgrading myself, making me believe as if I'm dirty and small. It's only then that I learned that you cannot expect people to love you unless you truly love yourself. I've been looking for that love and fulfillment somewhere and someplace else, but at the end of the day, it's always you who will save yourself. It's a sad fact of life that most of the time, you can only count on yourself as people have their own businesses too- they do have the same troubles, pains, frustrations, and worries that we cannot afford to add up as their burden.I'm not saying that we really will be forever alone, but sometimes, we all have to be alone to cherish all the more the feeling of having company. That's why I learned to enjoy my moments of solitude because I know for a fact that I am not forever alone. Someday soon, my one true love will come into my life, and even if there will be ups and downs in that relationship, I can feel it in my heart that it is worth the wait.

I also learned to be more talkative and sociable. Thanks to my newfound community- The Feast. Through The Feast, I was able to share my talents, meet more people, improve on my relationships with people, love and value myself, work on my attitude and behavior, and most importantly be closer to my creator. All these I had in one organization. I never really felt this light before, and honestly, everyday, I look forward to attending our worship service and our caring group meetings. I also look forward to meeting more people and extending a helping hand to different forms of outreach activities. I used to be really bored of life lately, but now, I felt that 7 days a week is not enough to do all the things in my checklist. The world is now mine for the taking that I can do so much. This time, I am not afraid. I have someone up there who will back me up.

So even if I failed in my relationship recently, I am not really down in the dumps. I'm glad that I was given the grace to learn, to move on, and to pick up the pieces no matter how distressing the situation is. As I am always telling myself, I am no longer questioning why things end up that way. All I have right now is an enduring, open, grateful,and understanding mind. As it is, trials do come to shape us to the person we want to be. Besides, if we fail today, that is an opportunity to examine ourselves and strive to be better the next time around. Life is one big roller coaster ride, full of excitement and thrill, and instead of being devoured by fear and paranoia that we might fall, we can always raise our hands, shout at the top of our lungs, and enjoy the one hell of a ride.

The curtains of year 2012 are about to close, but I am not really leaving yesterday behind. If some areas of my yesteryears are full of bitter and painful memories, I will use them as a source of inspiration to do better. It may be easier said than done, but I will try everything so that I won't end up doing the same mistakes, again and again. At the end of the day, I thank my Almighty Creator for everything that happened because despite all the obstacles, He has still blessed me abundantly thus far- in my relationship with family, friends and others, in my career, in my studies, and in my financial life. I am still praying for that love, though. But I am open to all the possibilities and claiming my victory as early as now. And even if I get hurt before, I will carry on because nothing just happens. Today I can say with conviction I love my life and I would like to live a hundred years, and I am happy for being me.

Let's all be strong dear friends. God will also answer our prayers.

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

Christmas single??? No more!

Hail to the Holiday and Christmas season. How may days do we have before that time of the year comes, once again? Here we are again busying ourselves with the endless Christmas shopping and panic buying, as if its the "end of the world." Oh well, seriously speaking, Christmas is always something we look forward to.

As for all the SMPs out there, welcome to the federation! But honestly, this time around, for reasons unbeknownst to me, I really don't know why I'm not fretting this team. Comparing to how I was 3-4 years ago, I always ALMOST cry everytime it's Christmas thinking that "Here I am again, single, lonely, no boyfriend, not even a single suitor or admirer." The year 2012 was really a big turning point in my life. Things do change, though not in an instant, and much as I am certain that I want and need to be inlove, I am not overly paranoid about it. Not anymore.

Maybe because recently someone broke my heart. But well, yes, I decided to let him go (and set him free so I can free myself from the manacles too) once and for all. There's no used to be stuck on the same plane while you're just waiting endlessly for Mr. Paasa. Cris has his own reasons, which I tried to understand. Admittedly there were lapses on my part, too. And much as I regret it, it's too late. Anyways, you have too learn to grant yourself forgiveness just the same. If things did not work out the way you both wanted it to be, acceptance is the sure key. Someone better is out there waiting for me, I just have to believe everyday, and yes, endure and wait PATIENTLY.

So what's there to look forward to this Christmas? Lovelife? It will come, YESSS!!!! Deep inside me, I know I deserve that good guy I am praying for. Perhaps that's exactly the reason why I am excited rather than panicky that the Yuletide Season is coming. I am overly anticipating, and my arms and heart are both wide open for the blessing. Unusual? Yes it is for me to act this way! First time? Yes it really is! I'm glad for the change that's happening to me. And this time, I will take it to heart, I'll do my very best to ward off the paranoid and desperate thoughts.

I'll live a hundred years and do everything that I can to live meaningfully. Deep inside my heart, I know that I have a family to build and take care of, that with my kids and hubby. Whoever he is, I just hope he will know how eager and overly excited I am to finally meet him. Would you believe when I say my love tank is overflowing that I'd like to share that love with someone else? It really is. I am ready to give that love wholeheartedly. I know I will. My heart is telling me it is coming, soon.

Hence, this coming December, I know there are innumerable reasons to rejoice and celebrate. With a happy heart, I am ending this year with prayers and faith that finally God answered my prayer, I just have to believe. I am no longer desperate and doubtful, I know it's here. He's coming. How will I know? My heart will just tell me, and when he's finally there, there's not a moment to loose, as I will never let go.

So to my darling and dearest, see you. I know this Christmas will be the happiest ever. Even if you may not be around during that time yet, I claim it that it will be the time that God will finally give His big YEEESSSS to my prayer.

"And whatever it is that you asked for in Prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."
Amen!!!