friend of mine

I've known you for so long
You are a friend of mine
But is this all we'd ever be?
I've loved you ever since
You are a friend of mine
But babe, is this all we ever could be?

You tell me things I've never known
I've shown you love you've never shown
But then again, when you cry
I'm always at your side
You tell me 'bout the love you've had
I listen very eagerly
But deep inside you'll never see
This feeling of emptiness
It makes me feel sad
But then again I'm glad

I've known you all my life
You are a friend of mine
I know this is how it's gonna be
I've loved you then and I love you still
You're a friend of mine
Now, I know friends are all we ever could be

You tell me things I've never known
I've shown you love you've never shown
But then again, when you cry
I'm always at your side
You tell me 'bout the love you've had
And I listen very eagerly
But deep inside you'll never see
This feeling of emptiness
It makes me feel sad

But then again
Then again
Then again I'm glad

No one says I'll love you when I'm ready (repost from Kat M)

* I happened to find this blog from my close friend's site. And yes, I can very very much relate with it. I am still even thinking if the girl is me. Hohohoh



This is from He Says, She Says, He Say, a column in Manila Bulletin written by Chico, Delamar, and Gino.


‘No one says I’ll love you when I’m ready’
15 May 2013

DEAR CHICO, DELAMAR, AND GINO… My friend Lena has been in love with her high school friend for over three years now. I can say that they are close, they watch movies together, eat out, and go on trips with the entire group. I have been urging her to confess her secret love to him because I think there is something between them. Also, I know that he is the reason why she cannot like somebody else even if she has other suitors.

When Lena finally got the courage to tell him she likes him, he replied with “You are my ideal wife, but now, I still think like a teenager, I am not ready to be with you.“ What do you think this means? She always comes to me for advice, but I only have one thing to say: If a guy really likes you, he will move mountains just to be with you. If he doesn’t, then his reasons are like the stars, countless. What should I tell her? She has been waiting for him so long and I don’t want her to hurt anymore.

CHICO SAYS… I would tend to agree with your line of thinking. With the exception of a very, and I stress on the word VERY few men, most men would go for the girl they want, no ifs or buts about it, and just go for the prize. Men are not exactly known for their EQ, opting to gobble when they have the option to nibble instead. The whole “I’m not ready” bit is largely reserved for the women, who probably love the guy to bits already, but would act coy for the sake of their feminine wiles. Men don’t have the same penchant for hemming and hawing. I’d even daresay that if he really liked her, he wouldn’t even have waited for her to profess her love first. And even the most torpe of guys, once the girl does the job of taking out the guesswork, would gladly pick up the spoils. But you know what, she’d still probably stick around until he comes around. So you can give your honest two bits on the matter, because I doubt if it’ll make a dent in her resolve. I think only he can really put an end to this once he finds the courage to say how he really feels about her. But who knows, he might actually be one of those few men who are honest about their feelings?

DELAMAR SAYS… Tracy Chapman once sang, “A love prepared for days to come is as good as none.“ Nobody promises “I’ll love you when I’m ready“ or “I’ll love you in two, three, or four years.“ Either you love somebody or you don’t. And guys are the type who will go for what they want. If they want you, they’ll go after you. Besides, your friend is not asking this guy to marry her. It’s just at the boyfriend/girlfriend stage!  To me, he’s just coming up with smooth excuses not to be in a relationship. It sounds like he’s complimenting her by calling her ‘ideal wife’ material. But really what he’s saying is that he does not want to be in a relationship with her. Whatever the reasons are behind those words, it’s the same result -he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with your friend.

I think you gave your friend the appropriate advice. She probably won’t take your advice because she’s in love with him. Just keep telling her what you’ve been telling her. She’ll let go when she’s good and ready. For now though, just stand by her even as she chooses to make a fool of herself because of “love.“ We’re all bound to do that at least once in our lifetime. We are all fools for love one time or another. But lessons will be learned sooner or later. Hopefully, it will be sooner rather than later for your friend.

GINO SAYS… What can I say, love is always complicated. I think that in this case though, either he just wants to keep her around as a back-up plan (as harsh as that might sound) or he still wants to play around. One of the reasons your friend is probably being neglected by this guy is because she’s just too readily available. Trust me when I say that whether you’re a guy or a girl, being too available is just not something that’s appealing to the opposite sex.

It’s difficult to pull away from a person when you like them, but at this point, if your friend wants the attention of the guy, I honestly think she should make herself unavailable. Yes, it’s a gamble because he might just completely forget about her, but at least it’ll help her move on either way. I mean come on, if you met the person that you really wanted to end up with, would you really let her go, with the risk that some other person will pounce on her or take her away?

My friends always tell me “mag pa miss ka naman.” In this case, I think that’s exactly what she should do.

keeping the passion alive

I was struck when a friend told me "keep the passion alive."

As a teacher, those are big words and easier said than done. With the pains of preparing daily lesson plans and materials, the challenge of molding each students into persons of character, and the responsibility of making sure that the students' problems concerns are addressed- all those are enough reasons for a teacher to be on the verge of giving up. Teaching is taxing and not that financially rewarding, and with all those, many tried, but few stayed- some are still struggling and contemplating whether they should leave or learn to love what they do. Sometimes, more than the work and the students themselves, there are also other concerns- administrators, school system, colleagues, and parents. For someone who is trying to strike a balance in their work, school, family, and social life, maintaining that passion is indeed a Herculean task. When the work drains the best out of you, then it's when the questions and frustrations kick in.

But is teaching never fulfilling or rewarding? Does the reason to leave outweigh the reason to stay? I would like to strongly believe, that despite all the challenges, there are still enumerable reasons to love teaching.

How can one not learn to love teaching, when in the most random moment, a student will hand a note saying "I love you," "Thank you," "I'm sorry," or "You're the best teacher"? Is it not fulfilling enough, when in the most random moment, a student will give an artwork painstakingly done, just to show you are appreciated and loved. Will it not warm a teacher's heart, when a student runs after to greet and give a big hug? Or how difficult it is to feel fulfilled, when after years or months, students still acknowledge and visit you, just to give an update on their lives? All the more it becomes momentous when after a tiring discussion, a student will tell a teacher that he/she enjoyed the lesson and learned so much from that day. Are those not enough reasons to stay?

The joy in teaching is usually not found on the perks of the job, in the salary raise, the promotion, in the improvement of the school system, but on the random and simple moments with students. True, students are hard to deal with nowadays, they can be stubborn, mischievous, and rowdy, but at the end of the day, they are still the very reasons for a teacher's existence and to be motivated enough to stay in the profession. Their random and simplest of all acts are the very reasons which give a teacher countless joy. And all those are even more rewarding than any material possession. 

Therefore, the secret to keeping the passion alive in teaching is finding joy and happiness in everything a teacher does. There might be thousands of reasons to rant about, but when a teacher starts to learn to love and appreciate all the simple things in her life and with her students- the passion is not just there to remain, but there to ignite even more. It is truly challenging not to complain, it is a normal occurrence in every field, but a change in mindset will always help. If a teacher constantly does her best to be exemplary in her craft, and does everything with zest, purpose, and happiness, then one can counter the feeling of work drain. Or when one feels she's on the edge of the cliff and about to jump off, pause for a while, take a look at your students, have that moment of introspection. And when you realize that you still have a purpose and role to fulfill, that your students still matter to you, that you still want to effect change and mold lives in the process, then maybe it is enough reason to teach.

The challenges will pile up as days go by. The problems in the schools and in the systems are there to stay. Teaching may never be economically rewarding at all. But a teacher chooses to stay not because of that, she simply believes that she should never give up, as she realizes her importance in the lives of her students. When a teacher learns to love and accept her students for who they are and for who they are not, then life becomes more purposeful and meaningful and the passion will be kept aflame, regardless of the many impediments that will come her way.

It may sound melodramatic, but it is never too late to keep the passion alive. And for those who can, teach. We may not realize the impact of making a decision to stay and remain true to our call to be a noble teacher, but one day, it all will make sense. Teachers are no nonsense human beings, as they will forever play a crucial role in the lives of students. As Henry Adams put it "A teacher affects eternity, he can never tell where his influence stops." Take the challenge. Teaching is always, worth the try. :)

a teacher's life :D

"I'm starting the School Year 2013-2014 right!"

That has been my "mantra" ever since we get back to work last May. Sure there has been a lot of changes at work- new level, more requirements, more tasks, more demands and expectations. But all it takes is a positive attitude and a happy heart to accomplish all those. I'm pretty happy that most of my friends belong to the same Grade Level where I am currently assigned, so that means there will be less stress ( though it won't necessarily mean work is easier). I'd like to count that as a blessing and though things seem to be tough during the batch turn-over (when the former grade level teachers shared the batch profile), I would just consider all these a challenge which I will willingly and courageously surpass.

May and June is all about preparations for the upcoming new school year. There are a lot of renovations and changes going on due to the K+ 12, but I'm confident we can cope with it soon.  Thankfully, I just finished my learning plan for the entire 1st term (congratulations to me!), so I am excited to work on our classroom decorations and bulletin board. Since I am a cat lover and I am assigned as the class adviser of Grade 5C, we decided that our theme for this SY will be cats (meowwww!). Sure it will be a cute thing to see and behold, and I am just eager to see how it will look like once we are able to put them together in the classroom.

Funny thing though, but I am highly anticipating the first day of class and meeting with the students. The first day is always crucial because that means establishing all the rules and regulations, plus you have to make students feel at home and comfortable in school, but I know we can always find a way on how to make things work for both of us - teachers and students alike. After 3 years of teaching, maybe I can now confidently say I am getting the hang of it, and now is the time to step up a little further and be more aggressive at work (in a good way). I am fervently praying though that things will turn out well- with less problems with students and complaints from parents. I really have to pray hard.

I have to keep this energy up to the end of the school year. I know it's difficult to sustain the zest, but I believe no matter how tired and exhausted I become at the end of the day, teaching will always be my first love. I would not last for three years in this profession if my heart is not into it. Surely there will be obstacles along the way, but with faith and constant praying, in my heart, I strongly believe, all is well! :D

I'd like to claim that this SY 2013-2014, I will be a champion in all aspects. The odds will be in my favor. It is and it will be. I can create wonders and miracles, because I believe! :P

Cheers to the start of SY 2013-2014!

Happy teaching and enjoy learning kids!

-with love,

Ms. Llabore

happiness :))

Just when I thought that the chances are low, life seems to have an ultimate turn-around. All it takes is one brave leap and step to the fulfilment of one’s dreams, and sometimes, you can’t always play it safe and keep mum. I would ask myself, what if I just kept it to myself up until now, but with the good things happening to me lately, I know I have made the right choice, indeed.

It may be too early to tell what could be in store for us. I never know what tomorrow might bring. But why worry? I can live by the moment anyway, and enjoy while all good things last. Getting overly anxious about things wouldn’t lead me anywhere. So instead, I’ll just sit back, relax, and cherish all that is here.

There are things which, for me, are unimaginable, but they are happening. Sometimes, when you are about to give up and move on, life will take a swerve and lead you to where you are supposed to be. I could have chosen to let go. But the feeling is so intense and overpowering, that I chose to fight for it instead. I have readied myself for the worst and I know what to do just in case it would not yield me favorable results. Fortunately though, the odds are in my favour and up to know, there are more surprises, every single day.

I am happy indeed. Overjoyed, overwhelming, sometimes overly ecstatic. This time, I would like to say, that I would let go of sad and pessimistic thoughts, because I just want to claim that my happiness has come. It has been a long wait. I fought hard for it, too. So I will never ever let it go.

Excitement envelops my being. I am filled with anticipation. For the time being, I will not rush. We are on the right track. And I know it will happen, soon.

shrimp pasta happiness

It was my mom's birthday yesterday, so as a birthday surprise (aside from a card and a gift), I decided to cook her an olive oil based shrimp pasta. It was a pretty simple dish, yet, so yummy and flavorful. Plus, it's healthy because it's seafood, and I used olive-oil instead of the usual cooking oil. My mom loved my dish and she gave it a 9/10!!! 

I'm so happy and proud of myself!

More to cook!

Lovelovelove,

Lenlen

for us girls (repost)

For Girls : 

1. A man won't let go if he really loves you.- Do not hold on to someone who has let go of you. He does not love you and does not value having you. Believe me, he will not let go if he really loves you. There is another reason he is not willing to tell.

2. Do not look for reasons why he ended the relationship.- There is only one reason why he ended your relationship. He just does not love you. Do not waste your time thinking of reasons or what you should have done. Move on and be open to a man who will truly love you.

3. Do not get hang up on your past.- Do not nag or distrust your current boyfriend just because your ex hurt you. Do not treat him or the relationship the same way. Do not compare. He will not react the same way as your ex. Do not be worried that your simple mistakes will cause him to look for another girl. What happened with your ex was not your fault. It was not because you didn't guard him enough or you didn't make him happy enough.

4. Do not look into images.- How many times have you met a girl who didn't have the best image in school or at the office, but you get to know the girl and found out she was actually extremely nice? Do not rely on images. Oftentimes, it is far from reality. Do not fear men just because your "supposedly" perfect ex-boyfriend mistreated you.

5. Always have your own set of rules.- Set your limits on how far you'd go for a guy. It's perfectly ok to give and do everything as long as it's worth it. And it’s worth it if the guy is treating you right.

6. Do not be scared to lose him.- Don't be scared that he'll break up with you. Once you are afraid of losing him, you easily can be taken advantage. Be strong and if something is unacceptable, do not accept it and speak up.

7. Avoid calling your guy.- It’' a guy thing. The relationship will definitely be better if it's the guy who's calling, not the girl. He will get tired of you if you keep on calling. He will lose interest and challenge. More so, he will get annoyed. But it's a girl thing also that your fingers get too itchy until you dial his number. But avoid as much as possible. Call only if really needed (like checking if your suspicions are reasonable).

8. There is a guy who will value you.- There is a guy out there who can make you feel valued, appreciated, and loved. And I mean, not just during your first few weeks together. So don't lose hope. Don't settle for a lesbian if you are not attracted to women. There is a man out there who can love you like a girl can.Also, do not believe him when he says it's just the way he really is. He's not the sweet or expressive-type. Remember during your first few weeks together? Where has that sweet guy gone? He simply is not that into you anymore.

9. Always be the only one, no matter what.- Do not ever fall for a guy who has another girl, be it his wife, girlfriend, or any girl that he says he just can't get rid of for whatever reason. If you truly believe that he loves you and for some reason, he can't leave or let go of another girl, then you are no different from any ordinary mistress.

10. He must respect you.- No matter how long the relationship has been, he should always show respect towards you.

11. If he fooled you, end it.- Philandering once is enough. You can never trust nor respect the person again.

12. Never start a relationship the wrong way.- Do not steal another girl's man, for whatever reason. Nor should you enter a relationship for the wrong reasons (loneliness, on the rebound, getting back at your ex, man-dependency, etc.) it is bound not to last. You will only end up wasting more years of your life.

13. Do not force yourself into a relationship.- Do not get into a relationship just because your friends are getting impatient with your dating escapades and the one hasn't come yet. Do not choose who to say yes to based on superficial things like money, looks, cars, etc.. If you are even thinking of these things, you have not fallen in love yet.

14. Do not settle.- If you are not happy anymore with your relationship, break up instantly. He will not stay with you forever no matter how upright he might seem to be. Eventually, he will also want love and happiness in his life.

15. A relationship has to have love.- Love is the only thing that will push you to give your efforts into making the relationship work. And believe me, keeping a relationship requires genuine efforts of both parties.

16. Don't be afraid to be single.- It's fun to be single, try it. You can go out whenever and wherever you want. You are free. You can date whomever you want and you get to go out for free! Do not get a boyfriend just for the sake of having one. Do not settle.

17. Be a good girl.- Be a good girl to attract a good guy. Enter the relationship with sincere intentions. Take the guy and the relationship seriously with the plan of spending the rest of your life with that person (of course, this is after you had your bit of fun in your younger years). If you compare your flings from your real relationships, you will know that the latter makes you happier and more fulfilled.

18. Love without limits.- Whether you loved and gave everything or loved but held out for some things, if the relationship ends, you still get hurt. But if you gave your everything, you were happy and you could say that it was worth it. If you didn't give your all, you get hurt for nothing.

19. You will get over him.- Love is over-stated. Love eventually ends and you are free to love another.

20. Be the one.- Act like you are the one. Don't be a nagger. Don't hinder his gimmicks. Don't give in to him too easily. Make him treat you as important. Don't be easy. Don't be like every other girl he had in his life.

A man won't let go, if he really loves you.